In Which the Author Tells a Story With a Backstory...

...in order to fully understand the awesomeness of my adventures this week, you have to go back in time a little bit.

Late last fall I was busy planning my Christmas vacation to Jordan, where I was meeting up with my cousin and her husband.  Part of the trip included an invite to a Muslim wedding, for which I didn't have anything to wear.  I spoke to (begged) my mother to choose, purchase and send me something to wear.

6-12 weeks later...  (I kid, I kid.  My family is awesome and always ponies up for the fast shipping since Canada Post sucks)

My package arrived, and when I opened it, I made this face:  O_o.

My mother had sent me some clothes, some random bits of Canadiana and a purple satin and black lace bustier top.  That's right, a purple and black bustier top.  I quizzed my mother and she admitted that it was for an occasion OTHER THAN The Muslim Wedding in Jordan (perhaps dancing for tips?). 

I didn't take it to Jordan.  I wore it to a friend's WHAT are you WEARING?!? party:

I also wore it to the Lady Gaga concert (which caused my neighbours in the elevator to idly wonder if I was "Russian", which means...purchaseable in Korea :S).  It was now time for it to be laundered.

I was scared of running it through the washing machine, so I wandered down to the local Lotte Mart (a large store with groceries, a photo shop, a pet grooming place, a food court and a dry cleaner).  The nice man rummaged through my pile of clothes without incident until he encountered The Muslim Wedding in Jordan outfit.  He pulled it up, held it at arms length, spun it around, turned it upside down, inside out and waved it in the air, attracting the attention of passers-by.

Then, he made this face:  O_o  ...

...and asked "ummm. Shirt?!?"

To which I answered "I guess so?!?" whilst blushing furiously.

So thanks, MOM.  Even the dry cleaning man knew it wasn't appropriate for a Muslim Wedding in Jordan.

In Which The Author Ponders Alternate Methods of Conflict Resolution...

So, there was an election here in Korea this week.  I don't pay a whole lot of attention to politics here (sorry about that, every poli sci teacher I ever had!), as I'm not (and never will be) eligible to vote here.  According to my students, this election was NOT for president--so maybe some sort of parliamentary election?  When I found out we got the day off work, I stopped asking follow up questions.

I assume there were campaign websites and probably tedious speeches, but the most entertaining part of the election process here is definitely the flashmob-style dance-offs.  Trucks drive around with people in the back, blasting political rhetoric over loudspeakers.  They periodically stop, disgorge all the people who immediately launch into a frantic, choreographed dance (presumably extolling the virtues of their candidate of choice through interpretive dance) for about two minutes and then leap back into the truck to repeat the process two or three blocks later.  SO ODD, but I can't help but wonder what would happen if we did this in North America.  Wouldn't it be AWESOME to watch Stephen Harper throw down on Parliament Hill?  Or Obama and The Republican Candidate To Be Chosen At A Later Date to have a walk/dance-off a la Zoolander?

At the decidedly more local level, I have had the in-person opportunity to watch my students resolve their differences through epic Rock Paper Scissors battles.  Students who are in the process of trying to KILL each other can be stopped in an instant with the declaration of "HEY!  Rock Paper Scissors!  NOW!".  They will immediately start throwing their hand-weapon of choice, repeating until a victor is chosen.  I can spend HOURS trying to reason with kids to no avail, but they instantly respect the power of the Rock Paper Scissors, and accept the result with an epic sort of fatality.  It's brilliant.  I'd love to tell my students about this: http://www.worldrps.com/ and maybe suggest participation in the World Rock Paper Scissors Championships, but I'm afraid that it might catch on in Korea and cause a rise in Rock Paper Scissors academies and additional hours of study for the kids...

In Which The Author is Very, Very Sorry...

...I know I've been terrible about blogging.  I constantly have all sorts of plans to blog that I never follow through on.  I have a stash of AWESOMEly terrible pictures, witticisms, bon mots and stories so funny, you didn't even have to be there.  And I have committed NONE of them to the proverbial e-paper.  Fifty lashes with a wet noodle for me.

If the paragraph above has gotten your hopes up, sorry about that.  Today is not going to be the day that I post in great depth about all of the awesome hilarity that has taken place since October.  HOWEVER, I will give you just the tiniest taste...

I was having a conversation today with one of my most favouritest people in the world, discussing one of my teeniest students.  He is itty bitty, has no teeth, wears a bow tie to school and is cute as a button.  He does not, in fact, know how to speak English.

I confirmed today that he knows the following (and ONLY the following) English words:
"I am here!"
"Pinishhhhheeee!"  (don't get me started)
"WOW!" and
"Oh, no!"

It was pointed out to me that while this does not form a complete (or even particularly useful) vocabulary, this particular student is now well equipped to navigate any situation that involves fireworks, natural disasters, and the very tricky question "Where are you?".